From Wrong to Right - The 4 Rs of an Intentional, Healing, & Meaningful Apology

personal development Dec 18, 2016
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None of us are beyond making a mistake, an unintended slight, a misstep, or a moment of cluelessness that causes injury. Don't dig in, make excuses, whitewash, or feign ignorance. The art of apology can turn things around when done well.

Recognize That You Did Something Wrong

You did it. You know you did it and so does the person to whom you’ve done wrong. Denying, rationalizing, justifying, or otherwise running away or hiding from it is making a tough situation worse and a burdensome obligation harder.

State clearly and concisely what you did to whom you did it.

Take Responsibility for What You Did

There, you did the hard part first. Now it’s time to own it. You did it and you know it was wrong. Congratulations, you’re not a psychopath.

Express Sincere Regret

Don’t do this half-way, don’t hold back, don’t worry about having it accepted. Time to say “I’m sorry,” in the most authentic and compelling way you are capable.

Congratulations, you're not a sociopath either.

Make It Right

If you can undo what you did, do that. If you can’t, ask what you can do, then do that.

There, that wasn’t so bad, was it? And by the way, don’t let it go to your head. You’re not going to be nominated for sainthood, but you opened the door for forgiveness and healing. At the very least you’ve regained your status as a decent human being.


Scott Perry, Chief Difference-Maker at Creative on Purpose

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